"Preemptive Email", by Jason Vickers

editor's note: this "preemptive email" was received one week after the due date for this month's submissions.

Here is a preemptive email, as long as you haven't written about poop you should rescind that as the topic. I was half testing you half joking half trying to extend my deadline for coming up with a prompt. That was all before I realized that there is actually only two halves in a whole, so in reality I was doing a 1/3rd of each of those. Regardless, any word is sufficient, and my guess is that not one of your friends has written anything about poop (you could argue that i was actually a 1/4ing everything, the last part being to upend any pretentiousness that is involved in overly creative endeavors, but that's more of a stretch than the latter three options).